Dear Society, Yours Sincerely

 

Dear Society

I am writing this letter to you because naming specific people is time consuming and pointless. You love to generalise, so let me extend to you the same courtesy. Let me plant questions that make you ponder, resulting in minds that wander.

Please allow me to say you are a hypocrite. You are horrid. Hating you is something I loathe doing because hatred takes up too much energy, and I can’t be bothered. But it’s hard. It’s hard not to hate you.

I don’t like that you’ve made people pessimistic and cynical. I don’t like that you’ve opened my mind, and then shackled it and made me aware of these shackles. I don’t like that you are selfish and embody the worst traits of society. I don’t like that you get away with anything and everything because you are so vast and nameless. I don’t like that you are referred to as a pronoun (‘they say’, ‘they think’, ‘they will talk’).

Too fat, too skinny, too ugly, too fake, too dumb, too smart, too ‘this’, too ‘that’. Nothing is ever good enough. Why has different become so intolerable in your eyes? Are you aware that your fierce tendencies of singling out individuals with any disparity, whether physical, emotional, or spiritual, are causes of hurt? As a child, I was always told our world would become an incredibly boring place if we were all the same, and I still believe that to be true.

Often times you insist you are accepting of anyone and everyone, but are you really? Through my eyes, I see standards set for everything - an endless set of obtuse guidelines outlining how one can be viewed as desirable, attractive, and valid. In adhering to them, people allow these criteria and rules to not only define who they are but also dictate how they live their lives.

Why? Because everything has the potential to be perfect? Perfect, meaning we would all be the same. Skinny but not anorexic. Tall but not a giant. Wealthy but not obnoxious. That’s not perfection but deficiency — people unable to be who they are for fear of judgment, rejection and abandonment.

And No. No, this isn’t some feminist rant. There’s no need for me to bring feminism into it because you lack comprehension of the fundamental values of feminism. What’s worse is you have twisted and contorted feminism, morphed it into something it is not and allowed that misrepresentation to bloom among a field of ignorant imbeciles – this irritates me too.

You presume to gauge my personality by looking at me through your lens. But here’s the thing Society, your lens cannot encompass the multitudinous nature of my being. Your outdated and misogynist values can’t fathom me. It’s useless to try. All I ask, all I have ever asked is to let me be. But that is the hardest thing for you to do. 

You see, it’s weird how I didn’t apologize earlier. Well…here goes, I’M SORRY. For everything. I’m sorry I’m black. I’m sorry I don’t look like a Victoria’s Secret Model. I’m sorry that my idea of a ‘’rad’’ evening includes a little bit of popcorn and a whole lot of Jesus. I’m so sorry that I don’t live up to your typical expectation of a submissive female being. I’m sorry that this queen doesn’t need a king to help her conquer. I’m sorry I hate dresses, the colour pink and dare I say make-up. And for all that I truly am sorry.

But most of all, I’m sorry to myself.

Dear self, I’m sorry I forgot to mention it to you that determining your value based on the number of likes on your photo is not quite right. I’m sorry that I didn’t let myself know earlier that I am more than a conqueror in Christ who made me. I’m sorry dear self that I took so long to set you free. That I took so long to let you know you have got nothing but mad hustle and a dope soul. I’m sorry, that I took so long to tell you that you are unstoppable. A force to be reckoned with.

Dear self, I’m sorry that I didn’t tell you that it’s okay to be different. It’s okay to be imperfect. It’s okay not to be okay. Here and now, my dearest self this is me telling you that you are a fireball of greatness. A ticking time bomb of potential waiting to explode and start a fire in a place elsewhere besides your soul.

Once again, dear society I apologise.  I’m sorry that I’m too much for you to handle. I’m sorry that I don’t follow your norms and that I choose to create my own. I’m sorry that I am everything but ordinary. I’m sorry that I am so incredible.

Yours Sincerely 

Percy♡